Assessment for Astro Love Company LLC / Astro Zen Marketing

Position: Copywriter

Date: July, 2024

Author: Eleonora Rodriguez

Disclaimer: This case study is for educational purposes only and belongs only to the author. The contents in this document may not be sold, shared or published by anyone but the author or without the written authorization of the author.

Assignment to apply for the role of Copywriter in Astro Love Company LLC / Astro Zen Marketing on LinkedIn
Assignment to apply for the role of Copywriter in Astro Love Company LLC / Astro Zen Marketing on LinkedIn.

Hi thanks for applying.

to continue your application and being considered for the position, please provide:

Re-write Instagram copy from our clients.

https://www.instagram.com/p/C9Sael1OnNO/

https://www.instagram.com/p/C9dxuV-tIUE/

https://www.instagram.com/reel/C9dIMEJP7u4/

Re-write of the content from Astro Zen Marketing's website. https://astrozenmarketing.com/

First and foremost, I want to thank you for your consideration for the position of Copywriter for Astro Love Company LLC, also referred to as Astro Zen Marketing.

As a brief introduction, I’ll tell you a bit about myself: I’m a journalist specialized in digital marketing and content creation for online media (including social media, web design, WordPress, SEO, and more).

I’ll be honest with you from the get-go: Doing the copywriting for three social media posts and an entire company landing page as an assessment just to be considered for a position seemed like a bit much to do for free.

So instead I gave it a twist that I think you’ll find even more useful in the end: I did a full audit of two of the social media posts and the Astro Zen Marketing landing page featuring details and direct actions to take to improve them!

But enough with the introduction, let’s get started!

Spoiler alert: As a surprise to no one, this person grabbed my work and ran away.

So overall I'd say it's a good thing I didn't do all of their homework... and I still get to keep my own work and polish it further as a portfolio case study.

Shocked Deadpool reaction GIF
Shocked Deadpool reaction GIF.

Part 1: The Instagram Posts

The first thing I noticed was that neither of those posts featured any relevant hashtags, while it's advised to use around 10 per post (as long as they’re relevant and fit the content well, because hashtag-stuffing can actually be punished by social media algorithms).

The post by @prestonsmiles post featured a wall of text of +200 words with no formatting and even a couple of typos, while the text in the post by @alexipanos was close to 400 words.

Considering Instagram is a particularly visual social media network, it's unlikely that most users will read 100% of the text, so I suggested keeping it short and sweet: no longer than 100 or 150 words. These words should be carefully chosen, since they must briefly address:

  • What happened (the reason for the post to exist)
  • Why their followers should care about the post
  • Something for them to do based on that post (a CTA)

Part 1.A: Rewrite the Instagram post by @prestonsmiles

Instagram post by @prestonsmiles
Instagram post by @prestonsmiles.

@prestonsmiles on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/prestonsmiles/

Post by @prestonsmiles: https://www.instagram.com/p/C9dxuV-tIUE/

Account followers: 300.000

Account posts: 7.258

Post likes (5 days after being published): 1.014

Post comments (5 days after being published): 164

Post engagement rate: 0.4%

Original post:

We do EMBODIMENT and nervous system work. But like for real :) why do I add that? Because most people don't understand how deep the well can go in our space. No hate, however most of the self development, spiritual community thinks that if they do more mindset work that they'll eventually get the transformation and results they seek, but the problem is we are more than our mind. And if you don't get the body and nervous system aligned with the mind it will be in vein. This weekend 93 beautiful souls did some of the most confrontative work you can do in these spaces, and we are deeply proud of them and us. The Bridge Experience is a 2 part journey that challenges peoples ideas about themselves and whats possible through learning about their nervous system and body. It's not note taking seminar style, it's not landmark life spring, it's a living organism that changes based on who's in the room and what they need. You are the workshop and the people in this picture are hero's to me because they were willing to be challenged and pushed in ways that would scare most. Drop the word Bridge ⬇️ or click the link in my bio if want more information ℹ️ we will be in Australia next and then back in austin and drop a 🔥if you get the importance of this kind of work

Optimized post:

We are more than our mind: It’s important for our bodies and nervous systems to be aligned.

We do embodiment and nervous system work… but FOR REAL.

The #BridgeExperience is a 2-part journey that challenges people’s ideas about themselves and what’s possible through learning about their nervous system and body.

This is not a note-taking seminar, but a living organism that changes based on who's in the room and what they need. YOU are the workshop!

This weekend, 93 beautiful souls did some of the most confrontative work you can do in these spaces, and we are deeply proud! The people in this picture are heroes to me: They were willing to be challenged and pushed in ways that would scare most.

We will be in #Australia next and then back in #Austin!

Drop a 🔥 in the comments below if you get the importance of this kind of work! Check the link in my bio if you want to learn more and participate!


Part 1.B: Rewrite the Instagram reel caption by @alexipanos

Instagram reel by @alexipanos
Instagram reel by @alexipanos.

@alexipanos on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alexipanos/

Reel post by @alexipanos: https://www.instagram.com/reel/C9dIMEJP7u4/

Account followers: 193.000

Account posts: 5.004

Reel likes (6 days after being published): 1.766

Reel comments (6 days after being published): 130

Reel engagement rate: 1%

Original post:

What does a new mama need most?

From my personal experience, one of the most crucial things I needed (having gone through 3 different full term births, with 4 kids) is for my man to nurture and take care of me while I was nurturing and taking care of our children.

That first year after childbirth is TOUGH for everybody involved- there is so much change and transition that takes place (even going from one kid to three for us- twins!)

But the extra job that the mother is holding- the care and survival of this new baby- is an incredible responsibility that takes so much- our bodies and brains rewire to focus on our child, our milk production takes all of our best nutrients for our child, and our world looks a lot different because there is such a high demand and need for mom during that first year.

And while all of that is a privilege that I’ve loved to be able to give my babies- the exhaustion is real. This is something I learned in hindsight- I didn’t know how to ask for this. Honestly- I was too busy trying to do it all and be it all (and getting really resentful for it).

So new fathers- when you feel kinda useless with a newborn that solely relies on mama for pretty much everything- the way your family needs you the most is to nurture the nurturer.

Love on her, make sure she eats/hydrates (she’ll often forget), pour into her, hold her through her emotional waves, have adult conversations with her that have nothing to do with the baby (because her entire world will feel very baby focused) and hold her as the woman you fell in love with. 😍

We may not be able to give as much energy and attention to you in this season of life (trust…we miss how things were before too!) but we still need, and so appreciate, your love, leadership and energy. It is what will build the foundation of safety for mama, which will ultimately pour into your baby from her. And that is leadership and love we cannot really get from anyone else in the special way that only you can give it to us. ❤️✨

Optimized post:

That first year after #childbirth is TOUGH for everybody involved, but the extra work for the mother -the care and survival of a new baby- is an incredible responsibility that demands so much! While all of that is a privilege that I’ve loved to be able to provide, the exhaustion is real!

So, new #fathers: When you feel kinda helpless with a newborn that solely relies on mama for pretty much everything, the way you can help the most is to NURTURE THE NURTURER.

Love her, make sure she eats and hydrates properly (she’ll often forget!), have her back and be patient through her emotional waves, have adult conversations with her that have nothing to do with the baby (because her entire world will feel too baby focused) and hold her as the woman you fell in love with.

Mamas everywhere need and appreciate your love, leadership, and energy. It will build the foundation of safety for any #mother, which she will ultimately pour into your baby.

#motherhood #fatherhood #family


Part 2: The Astro Zen Marketing Landing Page

Screen capture from the Astro Zen Marketing landing page
Screen capture from the Astro Zen Marketing landing page.

Grow Your Social Media and Attract People That Love Your Offers

Astro Zen Marketing is a digital agency that helps coaches and consultants share their messages with the world to heal and teach more people

BOOK A CALL

Our Packages

"Your Offers" sounds a bit aggressive and would apply mostly to social media profiles that have an e-commerce where they offer goods or services, instead of social media influencers and coaches.

So I suggest rephrasing it: "We Can Help You Shine In Social Media and Attract Those That Love What You Do"

In the same manner, the sub-headline can also be rephrased: "At Astro Zen Marketing we help coaches and consultants become known and spread their message across social media platforms"

Screen capture from the Astro Zen Marketing landing page
Screen capture from the Astro Zen Marketing landing page.

So now you have 2 Options...

Option 1

Take all the information that’s provided above. Spend hours (outside coaching) learning all of the requirements explained above.

Do it all yourself, or hire a VA from the Philipines or South America who doesn’t have the depth of understanding you have of your coaching and you’d teach them how to to it with you.

Go into different courses to speed a little bit your learning but never really having time, space and capacity to grow at the level and speed you want.

Option 2

You keep reading below, and see which of the services that I’ve spent years mastering works for you.

You keep perfecting your offers as a coach while there’s an expert on your team supporting and pushing with devotion to your success.

You enjoy the new evolution of your brand and the impact you start to make on your close community and all the new members coming into your space.

The way this section in particular is phrased can also seem a bit aggressive and problematic, since the two options provided can be summarized into:

A) "don't work with us and waste a lot of time and resources," or

B) "work with us and succeed."

I suggest that instead of setting such an aggressive tone, we focus on the benefits that the company can bring to potential clients. Make users feel good to draw them in… instead of shaming them if they don’t.

Option 1 seems a lot like what's called a "dark pattern" of design, in which the potential customer is being punished and shamed for not converting as we want them to. This can, as expected, discourage them from becoming clients.

However, the part I found the most questionable was the following: “Do it all yourself, or hire a VA from the Philipines or South America who doesn’t have the depth of understanding you have of your coaching and you’d teach them how to to it with you.”

Considering both the person that contacted me from the company and myself are from South America, it speaks volumes that they would assume South Americans are incapable of doing a VA job well. The cherry on top of the cake is the typo and the syntax error…

Steve Harvey reaction GIF
Steve Harvey reaction GIF
Screen capture from the Astro Zen Marketing landing page
Screen capture from the Astro Zen Marketing landing page.

Our Current Clients

PRESTON SMILES - MASTER COACH, 303K FOLLOWERS ON INSTAGRAM

ALEXI PANOS - MASTER COACH, 192K FOLLOWERS ON INSTAGRAM

JOHN WINELAND - TEACHER, AUTHOR, SPEAKER, 108K FOLLOWERS ON INSTAGRAM

This section doesn't feature the links to the social media profiles of the clients (as it should). Additionally, “Our Current Clients” makes it sound a little too transactional. A more friendly headline could be: "Our Success Stories" or “Trusted By.”

Design-wise, a few aspects could be improved as well:

  • Writing all in caps is not a best practice, since it can be difficult to read for some users.
  • The text is embedded in the images, which means it’s not part of the HTML code and the search engine crawlers can’t scan it (which doesn’t help when it comes to the technical SEO).
Screen capture from the Astro Zen Marketing landing page
Screen capture from the Astro Zen Marketing landing page.

THIS IS FOR

– Business and/or Lifestyle coaches with a defined offer and existing clients.

- Someone who is process oriented and also focuses on excellence and results.

– Someone who wants to focus on coaching and wants to scale up to a bigger team.

- Someone that wants to invest in their brand and think long-term.

– Someone who takes responsibility and is willing to learn.

THIS IS NOT FOR

– Someone who wants instant results with no process involved.

– A coach just starting out and trying to figure out whom to serve.

– Someone with a lone-wolf mentality.

– Someone who wants to figure it out on his/her own.

– Someone who blames on external circumstances.

Aside from the fact that I would strongly discourage writing all in caps again (which can harm SEO and also perform poorly when it comes to accessibility and screen readers), this section is also quite aggressive and borderline close to a dark pattern.

Instead of focusing so much on what's not wanted, the focus should be on what is wanted and what the company has to offer that can benefit the potential client.

And by the way, bullet lists should not be centered.

Screen capture from the Astro Zen Marketing landing page
Screen capture from the Astro Zen Marketing landing page.

PACKAGES

Short Form Videos

– Up to 40 short-form (15-60 sec) video edits with dynamic captions that will make your videos stand out!

- Scripting of the videos using proven frameworks to go viral and reach more people

– Targeted copy to engage your audience and invite them to join your programs

– You can request up to 3 videos from one day to the next

Investment 2000/Mo

ALM System: Video + SocialMedia + Email Marketing

Coaches' Favorite

– Everything included in the Short Form Video Package PLUS

– Posting & engaging on All Social media Platforms 7 days a week

– 1 hour response time.

– Copywriting, keywords, and tags and call to actions focused on your avatar included

– Trend Research every week

– 1 to 3 emails per week written and managed by our team

Investment 2800/Mo

Or 7100 For 3 Months

Video + Social Media Management

– Increase the traffic you get to your website or social media profiles.

– Drive qualified clients directly to your programs and offers.

– Take the lead as an authority in your area and industry.

One Time Setup of 700 or 500 per month (per platform)

This section doesn't feature the obvious: The currency. This is important to clarify because some potential clients might be from the US, Canada, Australia, UK, Europe, or any other area in the world.

Additionally, there’s no CTA to directly purchase or subscribe to any of the packages, and the “BOOK A CALL” button leads to a 404 page on Calendly.

How are users ever going to convert even if they wanted to?

Furthermore, it’s worth wondering what kind of digital marketing assistance can be provided by those behind an unoptimized landing page with an aggressive tone and an outdated design…

Screen capture from the Astro Zen Marketing landing page
Screen capture from the Astro Zen Marketing landing page.

More Case Studies

At last but not least, the “More Case Studies” section is just a carousel featuring three uninformative mockup images in a loop, which doesn’t help when it comes to building transparency and trust in the company within the digital marketing field.

This is where the actual case studies, achieved KPI’s, and any data validating successful strategies carried out by the agency should be proudly showcased.

Of course, the amount and degree of data that can be disclosed publicly should be discussed with each client and will depend on the agreements and contracts to avoid breaching any NDA's.


Wrapping Up!

So what can we learn from this?

Social media marketing:

  • Walls of text and typos are a no-go on social media posts.
  • Especially on primarily visual social media networks (such as Instagram or Pinterest), it's best to keep the word count close or below 150.
  • Words matter: Users will quickly realize if the copywriting is just filler content and will scroll past it without engaging. Your content must be relevant and invite them to engage in the comments section (for example, through asking them a question) and to share your post.
  • Use relevant hashtags in your social media copywriting, but don’t over-do it.
  • Keyword-stuffing is not copywriting and it will harm your SEO ranking.
  • If you hire a digital marketing agency to take care of your copywriting but your engagement rate remains at 1% or below, it's safe to assume that they're not doing their work as well as they should.

Website optimization:

  • When designing a website, keep accessibility in mind. Factors such as color contrast, not writing everything in caps, images having alt text, and not embedding text in images can make a great difference both in the user experience and in Google’s criteria for ranking your website.
  • Don’t shame potential clients for not being your clients (or for choosing not to convert at the time). Be friendly and pleasant, instead of aggressive.
  • Provide valuable information even to those that may not even be considering to convert: They might share your business to people that will!
  • Isolated images and mockups are not case studies by themselves.

In general:

  • Free assignments just to have an application to a job considered = unpaid work. Don’t risk the reputation of your brand. If someone gives you their time for free, the least you can do is thank them for it and provide feedback.

Do you have something in mind for us to work together?

You can find me on LinkedIn or you can also contact me directly through the form!